I thought I’d continue with the theme of new beginnings during the first week of the new year by telling you a “biggie” for me – something I had to learn at a deeper level than just on an intellectual level. I took up the game of pool about a year ago. And like everything I do, I jumped into it “full bore” and with ferocity unmatched by any other living creature. I practiced hours every day in this mad-like rush to conquer this goal as soon as I possibly could.
In general, my enthusiasm and full commitment pay off in learning and conquering new goals, but there are some that actually require a dispassionate approach. That was tough for me. I got thoroughly emotional whenever I missed even one shot! I quit several times out of utter frustration.
Fortunately, I have a great coach/teacher who keeps trying to get me to be quite robotic. He has me do what amounts to a ritual routine with each shot: look at the shot and imagine it happening as I put chalk on the cue tip. Then, put the chalk down and I pretend I’m doing the shot once or twice in the air, then get way down on the table and do practice motions up to the cue ball and then fire.
Once I am down, no more thinking, moving, judging…just faith that my mind and body have this covered.
This took the better part of a year to learn. But it works.
The too easy frustration with myself comes from a most critical father’s constant berating of me, and taking up pool has helped a tremendous amount with getting rid of that knee-jerk response.
I was setting up my weaving loom the other day, and everything was going wrong. The set-up looked seriously trashy. But instead of getting down on myself (like I would have done before), I just smiled, leaned over, cut it all off the loom and threw it away. I walked away feeling quite accomplished! Why? I just accepted that sometimes it doesn’t work – thrown away yarn is not the end of the world – and having the calm to make that decision to come back and loom another day is a big victory!
I hope this story helps you.