Monthly Archives: February 2010

The Most Romantic Movie of All Time

Cruising through the news sites, I recently came across a list of the Top 25 Most Romantic Movies.  I was amazed at a number of the choices:  adult male dancer in cheap resort “doing” a teenage girl (like they have a future together!); a woman having sex with her fiancé’s younger brother; people who meet while on a European excursion and immediately become intimate, and on and on.
 
When I was younger, I used to just “watch” movies and get caught up in the mushy emotions.  As an adult (and definitely as “Dr. Laura”), I watch movies on a much deeper level, and I’m not happy with the notion that as long as two people are swept up in fantasy and immediacy, it’s just b e a u t i f u l.
 
Maybe it’s because I spend hours each day on my radio program helping people extricate their hearts, minds, and collateral damage from their decisions to just go with the flow of erotic and romantic feelings.  I’m left trying to help them remedy the hurts done to others as well as themselves and the “accidental” children who do not typically benefit from “conception-on-the-run.”
 
The film The African Queen was, for me, one of the most romantic movies of all time.  Humphrey Bogart gives up being a surly, drunk, self-designated outcast for Katharine Hepburn, who gives up being an up-tight, prissy, self-avowed spinster, for a cause, using his little beat-up boat to sink a German war boat.  Having that joint goal (well, she had to work hard to get him out of his shell to be brave enough to re-join the world), and having to deal with deadly elements on a six-foot power skiff together, they built something really romantic.
 
Those of you who are married and struggling with illness or the economic “elements” should watch that movie together…twice!  I believe it will make you snuggle.  What brings people really close together is not just itinerant sex.  It is a joint goal, the attainment of which requires you both to become MORE.  Sometimes that goal is survival, and at other times, it may be the birth of a child, or a commitment to some effort in the world.  Great sex is the prize…it is not the substance of true love.

Quote of the Week

Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow.  The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing.
               – Abraham Lincoln
                  16th President of the United States

Today, February 12th  is Abraham Lincoln’s birthday.

There’s No Time Like The Present

A few months ago, I saw the movie “The Bucket List.”  It’s about these two older guys who, presumably, are terminally ill, and one of them mentions a “kick the bucket list,” meaning that you make a list of all the things you want to do before you die (and then, hopefully, go do them).  The movie is interesting and well done, and well worth seeing.  It stars Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson.

Since then, I’ve had some thoughts on and off about the concept, and decided that I don’t want to have a bucket list when my time comes close.  I want to do and see and say and experience the things that matter to me waaaaay before they become an almost-Last Supper moment.  So I’ve been going over in my mind what it is that I would put on that list.  And I’m happy to say……nothing.

I wanted an adventure on the high seas, so with a crew of experienced sailors, I’m going to be doing just that in mid-March, when we race from Los Angeles to Cabo San Lucas in Mexico.  It will take about four days or so, and we have to work, sleep, and eat in shifts 24 hours per day of sailing.  It will be grueling, cold, and sometimes scary at night if the winds are up.  The food will be “ucky,” and there won’t be hot showers or heated blankets.  And yet, I can’t wait, because it’s an ADVENTURE!  It pushes my limits and challenges me in new ways.  It’s good to have adventures, as long as you don’t ignore your responsibilities, and enjoy the challenges that are there.

Day-to-day experiences and routines can get monotonous – that’s just life.  So don’t wait.  Come up with your own adventure (camping with the family, training for some physical event or whatever you want) and just do it!!

The Solution to Unwanted Pregnancies

Just when you thought web-based programs couldn’t get more depraved, we have the introduction of a fake attempt to “humanize” the discussion about abortion by having “actors” pretending to be pregnant tell their sob stories and have you, the audience, decide if the baby should live or die.

I’m not kidding.  Supposedly, the producers got this bright idea from Barack Obama’s commencement address at the University of Notre Dame, when he said he wanted “to find ways to communicate about a workable solution to the problem of unintended pregnancies.”  I thought we already came up with such a solution:  it’s called ADOPTION.

Here’s the rundown of an episode:

1. A wife of a brave, deployed military man who screws around on him gets knocked up.
2. A wife of a man who is violent, but who keeps cranking out babies with him.
3. A couple who just wants to get on the phony reality show.

Yeah, this really advances the discussion about abortion.

Just because these women were irresponsible, should an innocent human being die?  Just because a woman has created a lousy circumstance for the well-being of a child, should the innocent child die?

How about this:  The entire time the woman is whining about her life, show a split screen with a live video of the fetus moving around, sucking its thumb, doing back flips, etc.  Then we’ll vote as to whether the mother should be given the death sentence after the baby is born.  What a great idea for a reality show!

The solution to unwanted pregnancies is to take responsibility, or to give that blessing to someone else.

Why Celebrate Valentine’s Day?

People have all sorts of reactions when Valentine’s Day comes around – some think it’s too commercialized, and others get hurt if they don’t get the traditional flowers or candy or card.  Still others don’t think it should be observed at all.  I think it’s time to recall the important reasons to celebrate:

Video: Why Celebrate Valentine's Day

Or watch other videos at youtube.com/DrLaura.

Read transcript here.

Governor Sanford’s Wife Admits to Living a Lie

Here’s the scenario:  you are a young woman poised to be married to a man who informs you in no certain terms that fidelity is not going to be a quality of your marriage.  You’re hurt and confused.  You call Dr. Laura.  You ask her opinion – should you marry this man?  Dr. Laura says:  “HAVE YOUR TUBES TIED.  YOU HAVE THE RIGHT AS AN ADULT WOMAN TO MAKE ANY CHOICE YOU WOULD LIKE (STUPID AS IT MIGHT BE), BUT I BELIEVE YOU HAVE THE MORAL OBLIGATION TO NOT IMPOSE THAT UNSTABLE, UNHAPPY, POTENTIALLY VOLATILE SITUATION ON CHILDREN.”
 
This discussion between South Carolina’s first lady (and soon to be ex-wife of Governor Mark Sanford) and me never took place.  She went ahead, married him, made children, crossed her fingers and her eyes, blinded herself, and now she and the children are in the public eye…embarrassed.
 
Jenny Sanford, in an interview with Barbara Walters (yeah, I know) admits knowing in advance, saying that not having a vow of fidelity bothered her to some extent, but “I got past it.”
 
She is now having her 15 minutes of infamy with a tell-all book, anguishing over the emails (which went public) where her husband talked about his lover’s body parts.
 
I think I’m more disgusted with what she is doing now – after colluding with the charade of a marriage – than in making this choice in the first place.
 
In general, why do women volunteer for this kind of situation?

* Optimism
* They think they’re special and he will be different with her
* They believe in romantic fantasies and that love will heal all
* Dependent loyalty
* Emotional attachment
* Embarrassment at admitting a mistake
* They believe there is money or power to be gained

Mrs. Sanford is embarrassing her children and herself, which is tacky and unclassy in my opinion.

Quote of the Week

…I haven’t met a player or a coach whose goal isn’t to win the Super Bowl.
               – Alvin Ray “Pete” Rozelle
                  Commissioner, National Football League (1960-1989)