Discarded Babies?

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The Boston Herald (February 25) reported that, in 2007, a record number of newborn babies were given up by their parents (in reality, probably just the mother) under Massachusetts’ Baby Safe Haven program.

The law came to pass after state Representative Barry R. Finegold (D-Andover) proposed the bill, which would allow a parent to legally surrender a baby, aged 7 days or less, at a hospital, police station, or manned fire station without facing criminal prosecution.  In other words, under certain conditions, Massachusetts legalized child abandonment.

Honestly, I cannot understand the critics of this law.  They argue that the law creates an “easy out” for reluctant mothers.  Darn straight!  The fact is that these girls and women didn’t legally kill the baby in their bodies, nor did they abandon them in a dumpster or toilet.  They knew that they couldn’t raise a child and had an option which contributed to the well-being of that child and the adoptive family.

Another criticism is that this strips children of their heritage.  Are you kidding? Since when does one’s place on a genetic family tree trump a loving home environment?  They also say that this law promotes irresponsibility.  What?? What is more responsible than giving a child over to people who will arrange for the child to be loved and nurtured, when they know they cannot?

The Department of Social Services, which oversees the Safe Haven program reports that the Baby Safe Haven hotline has helped thirty women to get into a parenting or adoption plan.  They also said that “parents give up their babies for various reasons, including post-partum psychosis, emotional immaturity, and social isolation.”  Whatever the reasons, the woman is still making a conscious choice to “save” her baby from her own emotional and social problems.  I say these women are heroes.

Letter of Love

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Listener Leslie wrote:

It’s almost Valentine’s Day, so I wanted to tell you about my sweet husband.  We have been married for over two years, and are now hoping to adopt a baby (you wouldn’t believe how long and tedious this process is, but we know it will be worth it!).  He has always supported my decision to be a stay-at-home mother, and we’ve been saving and planning for two years. 

Two weeks ago, after a long day at my stressful job, I came home crying.  My wonderful husband told me to quit my job, stay home, and relax so that I am 100% ready to be a mother. 

Oh, Dr. Laura, what a relief!  Tomorrow is my last day at this job, and every morning for the last two weeks, I have made my husband lunch, and my job is now to make our dollars go as far as possible.  Every night, he has come home to a happy wife, a hug, an “I love you,” and a hot meal.  Oh, how he beams! 

We may not yet have a baby, but I can already say that my husband is his kid’s dad, and I am proud to be his wife.

The Real Meaning of “Choice”

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I had an experience recently I will not soon forget.  I had a conversation with a woman with whom I’ve become quite friendly who told me a fascinating story.
    
She was adopted.  Although she is very close to and loving with her adoptive family, she was quite interested in knowing something about her birth mother and father - for medical history reasons (I never quite believe that, considering the technology available today for diagnoses) and for curiosity’s sake.  She realized and accepted that there would probably be “the good, the bad, and the ugly” to learn, and she was right. Continue reading The Real Meaning of “Choice”…