Moms Have Some Control Over Rise in Childhood Obesity

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A good two-thirds of our population is fat or obese and that also goes for our kids..  Fat and obese.  And there is more and more evidence coming out as to why.  Poor eating habits, poor activity habits, and not genetics are the underlying causes for adolescent obesity according to a new study in the American Heart Journal.

In 1980, 6.5% of US children, from 6 – 11 were considered obese.  That rose 20% by 2008. 

Only one third of all kids were reported as exercising a minimum of 1/2 hour for 5 days during the prior week.  Do you realize…only one third of all kids were reported as exercising only 1/2 hour for 5 days.  What is that?  Kids don’t need to exercise — they need to go out and play.  Formal exercise is not necessary.  They need to go out and play. 

Obese kids were less likely than non-obese kids to participate in regular exercise.  No kidding — don’t you love research like that?  A lack of sleep is linked to obesity.  Giving babies solid food too early is linked to obesity later on, except if kids are breast fed for a minimum of four months.  Breast feeding seemed to fix that.

The most important part of this study is the part that gets people mad.  Well, it gets moms mad.  Children’s chances of becoming fat rises the longer mothers work outside the home.  Weight problems among children have soared in the past 3 decades as more women have joined the workforce. 

A consortium of researchers at American University examined the relationship between kids’ weight and mothers’ work schedules and what factors about a woman’s work might contribute to fat kids.  They used data from 990 school-aged children in the study of early childhood and youth development.  The longer the woman worked, the higher the likelihood her kids would be fat. 

 I’ve gotten so many calls from moms upset their overweight kids, are getting razzed at school about being fat or obese.  And they want everybody to stop commenting on it.  My suggestion is to make sure your family is not fat or obese anymore and the comments will stop!  It’s a voluntary condition. 

Just do this little bit of anecdotal research:  go to any restaurant (lunchtime in particular).  Look at the thin people and see what they order.  Look at the fat people and see what they order.  By and large (pun intended) you will literally see why one is heavy and one is not.  Last week, I went to a family-style restaurant and I got myself a salad.  Salads can be very fattening if you put on dressing, so I always have the dressing on the side and take a little on the fork and drizzle it around..  I always get salads that have a little fruit in them because that keeps it moist.  And I look over at the next table and what do I see? A huge cheeseburger and French Fries.  I couldn’t believe it in this day and age. 

But the main problem children have is the inattention of their mothers, because their mothers are burning the candle from one end to the other and all along the middle.  Because women have been bullied by the feminist mentality, they no longer believe  being a mother and a wife and a homemaker is an adequate thing for anybody to do.

So they have full-time jobs, kids and a husband.  They can’t adequately take care of their kids to make sure they exercise and eat right.  I think it was 60% of what people spend on food these days is spent on fast food.  Well fast food tastes good because it’s high in sugar, salt and fat.  That’s what makes it taste good.

So when you think  “oh that piece of fish is so buttery,” it is!  God didn’t make that fish that way.  Whoever is in the back with the chef’s hat did it..  Yet mommies aren’t taking care of their families.  They are too busy feeling they should work or they are meaningless human beings.  They don’t feel like shopping and cooking fresh dinners for their kids.  And the whole family is sedentary because everybody is tired. 

So kids are fat.  And yeah, it’s primarily mom.  Sorry, I’m a woman.  I’m looking at this and remember that I always made sure we had proper food.  As far as exercise; my kid was always up and out and running.  That’s what kids should be doing. 

I am frustrated so many of you women have underestimated your importance.  What studies like this show is how important you are to the well-being and health of your children.  Being told you can dump them in day care and just shove any kind of food and put them into bed and that’s it, as long as there is money in the tiller, belies the fact that you’re really very necessary for their health and welfare, happiness, structure, religion –  all of this.  We call it “Mommy Power.”  And so many women are willing to give up mommy power for some job, for some money.  Even in this economy, it is very important we take care of ourselves as a family. 

Interview with Parents of Most Cyberbullied Kid in the World

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Brent and Phelicia Hatch are the parents of McKay Hatch, the teen who instigated the movement toward “No Cussing Clubs” in schools.  McKay has been called “the most cyberbullied kid in the world,” so I wanted to talk to his parents about what that did to the family and how they dealt with some unbelievable harassment.  In case you missed it, or you just want to hear it again, here’s the audio of the interview.

Helicopter vs. Free-Range Parenting

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I read an article from England last week about “free-range vs. helicopter” parenting.  According to the article, helicopter parents wrap their “children in cotton wool,” and free-range parents “give [their] offspring a bus pass and mobile phone and [let] them go for it.  One of the questions raised was “Should a three-year-old be allowed to risk possible (but unlikely) injury climbing to the top of the spider web in the playground?”

For myself, I’d say ‘yeah.’  Stand underneath or stand close and let them climb.  The worst that can happen is that they get a “boo boo.”  Especially if they’re boys, they need to do this stuff.  I don’t see that as either free-range or helicoptering.  Kids have to explore the world and sometimes they’re gonna get hurt.  My theory is if you have a kid who hasn’t broken a bone by the time he or she is 18, something is wrong. 

United States mother and controversial journalist Lenore Skenazy sparked a global outcry a few years ago when she left her 9 year old son in a Manhattan department store with instructions on how to find his way home on the subway, and then wrote about it.  The author of “Free-Range Kids” was labeled “America’s worst mother.”  I would have had her arrested for putting her child in danger.  Yet her reasoning behind her actions was part of her call for parents to raise safe and self-reliant children.  Well, unless they’re carrying a gun or are 5th degree blackbelts, that’s kind of silly. 

I decided to check out some of the information floating around the internet, and after looking at a lot of the numbers, here’s my conclusion:

Anybody who tells you that being a helicopter mom is stupid and suffocating should be sneered at.  The world is very different than what it was when we grew up.  There is a lot of anger.  For those of you who are among the older baby boomers, do you remember road rage?  No.  Did you know anything about gangs running around with guns and shooting up neighborhoods?  No.  What about drug dealers in the school (who are mainly other kids)?  No.  Do you remember 9 year old girls getting down on their knees to perform oral sex on the little boys in classrooms?  No.  So don’t tell me the world isn’t different.  You need to be alert.

I remember when my son decided he wanted to ride his bicycle to school. I agonized for a while and then said “absolutely, you can ride your bike to school.”  He went to bed all happy.  What he never knew was that every day, Dad followed at a distance so he could keep an eye on him without my son knowing Dad was there, just in case there was a car accident and he got hurt.  But he got to have his sense of independence.  He got to feel like a big boy on his own.  But we didn’t give up our responsibility to ensure his safety. 

Yes, you must helicopter at a distance.  To me, that’s the answer.  Free-range parents are what I see too much of today.  You’re either too lazy, too self-involved, too busy, busy, busy or just plain ignorant of your responsibilities.  But helicoptering at a distance is good.  Ultimately, our job is to nurture, to teach, to provide for them and to protect them.  And don’t lapse in the “protection department” under the notion that your kids need to learn independence.  Frankly, they have their whole lives to learn that.  So, let them use tools, let them go on adventures, let them do all kinds of things.  But helicopter at a distance.

If you’re on them for everything, you’re neurotic.  If you’re not on them for anything, you’re irresponsible.  So helicopter at a distance, or, if you must, free-range at a close distance.  Whichever version you like better.  It’s one thing to have your child get to 18 with bruises and bangs and another thing to have them get to 18 having been molested, abducted or sexually exploited, or pressured into using drugs.

Interview with Florida state representative Kelli Stargel

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I had a very interesting interview with Florida state representative Kelli Stargel, who has introduced a bill requiring teachers of grades K-3 to rate PARENTS, because she believes parental involvement is key to educating children.  You can hear the interview for yourself.

Forgetful Dad Puts Kids in Danger

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Is Mom overreacting when Dad leaves toddler kids unsupervised even for only a few minutes?

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Read the transcript.

Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

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The blogosphere is all abuzz with a lot of women furious about an article in the Wall Street Journal titled “Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior.”  It’s an excerpt from Amy Chua’s new book “Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother,” and basically, it’s an analysis of the Asian mentality versus the Western mentality of raising children.  If I had to pick one myself, I’d pick the Asian method of raising children. 

Chua writes: …A lot of people wonder how Chinese parents raise such stereotypically successful kids.  They wonder what these parents do to produce so many math whizzes and music prodigies…and whether they could do it too. 
   …
…when Western parents think they’re being strict, they usually don’t come close to being Chinese mothers.  For example, my Western friends who consider themselves strict make their children practice their instruments 30 minutes every day, an hour at most.  For a Chinese mother, the first hour is the easy part.  It’s hours two and three that get tough.
   …
Despite our squeamishness about cultural stereotypes, there are…studies out there showing marked and quantifiable differences between Chinese and Westerners when it comes to parenting.  In one study…almost 70% of the Western mothers said either that ‘stressing academic success is not good for children,’ or ‘parents need to foster the idea that learning is fun.’  By contrast, roughly ZERO per cent of the Chinese mothers felt the same way…..Other studies indicate that compared to Western parents, Chinese parents spend approximately 10 times as long every day drilling academic activities with their children.  By contrast, Western kids are more likely to just go play some sports.

I’ve been complaining for three decades about Western parents and just the things Amy Chua talks about.  One of the main differences I have seen between Asian families and Western families is that Asian families will put in the time.  They will not go blame the teacher.  They’ll work with their kid until the kid “gets” it.  Western families mostly blame the teacher and the school and moon spots, because (with their dual careers, divorce, remarriage, shacking up, and love lives) they don’t put in the time. 

I’m much more a believer in the ultimate benefits of strength and courage and tenacity in life that you find with the Asian mentality.  However, when the kids become adults, they can choose their way.  But when they’re growing up, they need to learn how to handle choosing their way.

My Modest Girls Are Getting Teased

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Mean girls are showing up in schools at younger and younger ages:

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My Kid’s Friend Stole From Us

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You’d like to think that, as a parent, you know a lot about the friends your children have. In this particular instance, unfortunately, that was not the case:

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Read the transcript.